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Woman says binmen took the mickey out her her sign requesting more recycling bags
Bins. The sure-fire way of getting angry people running to their local newspaper. And when the service industry workers don’t know their place at the bottom of the social pile, then the fury is all the greater. All she did was ask for more recycling sacks. Leicester Mercury: Woman claims bin man mocked her ‘More bags…
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Nominative determinism at its finest as Mr Podger told he’s too heavy to fly
Nominative determinism and Angry People in Local Newspapers – together at last! And this one isn’t pretty. Southern Daily Echo: Mr Podger told he’s too heavy to board over-crowded flight from Southampton Airport We have no idea of name of the other passenger denied as seat on the plane, but we are convinced it is Mr…
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Pensioners convicted over Loughborough sledgehammer brawl
We don’t normally cover court reports unless the story is so outrageous that we simply cannot ignore it. This is one of those stories. Leicester Mercury: Family members convicted after going after their elderly member with a sledgehammer in a row over shared land There’s nothing like a boundary dispute to bring out the very best…
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Angry Dutch People in Local Newspapers are angry about school closure
Hey you Brexit types, we have more in common with our European friends than you think. And to prove it, here are Angry Dutch People in Local Newspapers. Leeuwarder Courant: Haskerhorne strijdt voor behoud van der school Yeah, that’s easy for you to say. So here’s the translation: (Town of) Haskerhorne fights to save school.…
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Toronto residents have a (oh-ho!) BEEF over giant cow sculpture that’s appeared in their neighbourhood
Don’t (oh-ho! again) HAVE A COW, man!!!! But then, it’s appearance is (oh-ho-ho!!!) UDDERLY ridiculous, but the picture looks like the residents are totally (oh-ho-ho-ho-ho!!) MILKING it. Toronto Star: Charlestown residents not particularly pleased after large cow on stilts appears outside their homes I call (oh-ho!) BULL – cows can’t even use stilts. I ought to…
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Fine for bad parking could have been spent on the kiddiewinks, says mum
If you park badly these days, you get a fine. But – you know – it’s got to be somebody else’s fault somehow. AND MAYBE SHE’S RIGHT. And maybe there’s a solution that suits everybody. Eastern Daily Press: Mum blames council car parks’ lack of kiddiewink parking spaces for £50 fine for parking over the lines…
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Area man protests new housing development through the medium of outsize picture frame
Nobody likes big new housing developments, especially when they come to a small village with historic connections. And nobody likes a NIMBY, either. But at least this chap is being artistic about it. East Anglia Daily Times: Residents campaign against development in John Constable’s home village with a giant version of his classic work “Thirty Mile…
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Residents driven stark raving mad over loud seagulls
Seagulls. The cunning, vicious feathery bastards. Cooking in a pie is too good for them, mostly because seagulls taste like grilled turds. And that’s a FACT. Consider this poor chap. Daily Record: Dumfries residents demand action as the sound of seagulls makes them consider running amok with an axe, or something A seagull once shat in…
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Dog is furious after tree falls into his garden
I’m not going to (oh-ho!!) beat about the bush, but the best part of this story about a tree falling into a garden isn’t that a child could have been killed, but that the angriest person in the photograph is – in fact – the family dog. Bracknell News: Kiddiewinks upset, dog furious, as tree falls into…
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Charity boss will (oh-ho!) CLUB burglars to death
If you like a lot of chocolate on your biscuits, join our club. Unless you are the scumbags that stole biscuits from this charity, because they are going to CLUB you to death, force you through a strainer, and feed you to rats. And then the rats will be clubbed to death, and the cycle…