Woman buys chair.

Woman sits on chair.

Chair collapses.

Shop where she bought table and chair set for £600 tells her to do one.

Portsmouth News: Value household store The Range tells woman told she won’t get refund for broken chair because it’s out of warranty despite it being a manufacturer’s fault

Now, we quite like The Range, despite our local store being in the part of town which is twinned with North Korea.

It’s like the centre aisle of Aldi (or Lidl, if you’re that way inclined), except it goes on forever with a nnver-ending parade of [ahem] quality household goods you never knew you needed.

And like the centre aisle of Aldi, it’s a case of look but don’t touch, otherwise you’ll arrive home several hours later with a petrol generator and a family set of wet suits.

In that sense, it’s also like any branch of WH Smith in a motorway service station.

I once nearly bought a set of Robbie Williams horror masks there once, before my senses returned and I realised that I wasn’t – in fact – completely insane.

So, £600 on a set of dining room furniture? You should have gone to a dining room furniture shop for that. You know, people who care about selling you dining room furniture.

But seriously, here’s a nice living room suite you can have.

South Wales Argus (October 2016): Couple pay local council to have their old furniture removed, doesn’t happen

But you’ve got Christmas lights up in October. That’s a public shamin’.