Oh Lordy, it’s another Best of APILN post – 27 September


We might as well kick off with the important stuff. Where were you in 1987?

If you were involved in cider orgies in the Wicklow area or Ireland, or might have owned a menacing horse, do get in touch with your confession and we shall post it mostly anonymously.

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Bristol Post: Locals upset as post office and post box close

Some of the finest mugging to camera you are ever likely to witness.

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Kent Online: Fair Fuel campaign wallah upset after pranksters list his home address as a petrol station

Anonymous Google Maps vandalism is on a par with Wikipedia vandalism, and is a Very Bad Thing and we do not condone this sort of activity. So don’t do it, especially if you do not agree with the political leanings of the person involved. M’kay?

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Lynn News: Grim Reaper drops in on Downham Market

I DON’T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I COULD MURDER A CURRY.

Style point here – who knew that DEATH, reaper of souls, the End of Things wears white trainers?

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Wolverhampton Express and Star: Something about a community centre, but that is a MASSIVE thumb

To quote Massive Hand Guy from The Simpsons: “I’m tired of these jokes about my giant hand, the first such incident occurred in 1956 when…”

There. That’s your cultural reference.

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Nottingham Post: Neighbours show their upset over their road being used as a rat-run through the medium of pointing

IDEA: Bollards in the shape of elderly residents pointing at the speed limit sign.

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Stoke Sentinel: Former RAF bandsman who once played for The Queen, says next door’s horrible garden is dragging down his property values

He should get Her Majesty to return the favour. One trumpet voluntary = one royal intervention on Stoke-on-Trent property prices. It’s only fair, I read it in Magna Carta.

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North Wales Daily Post: Schoolboy forced to walk two miles following row with bus driver over Scottish five poond note

Just the two miles? He’s still got 498 miles to walk, then walk 500 more.

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Suffolk News: And finally, where would we be without oldiewonks with reactolite glasses complaining about the council not cutting back hedgerows?

A kiddiewink could lose an eye, you know. Please, somebody think of the kiddiewinks.

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