Look no further. Here’s the most midlife crisis news story you will ever see.
It has everything.
Bloody huge motorbike.
Specially constructed decking.
And – of course – epic sadface.
Yes, the ancient city of Bath is finally entering the 21st Century and is getting wheelie bins, but the residents there fear change and/or minor inconvenience to their lives.
OK, granted, this midlife crisis is going on a bit long (he’s 72), but you can’t help thinking he’s challenging Great British Bake Off’s Paul Hollywood in this photo.
“Are you pleased to see me or its that a three tier wedding cake down your trousers?”
And elderly Paul Hollywood isn’t the only celebrity lookalike biker to appear on these pages, Take a look at this from Down Under.
Sunshine Coast Daily: Biker FUMMIN after near miss with lorry on roundabout
Strewth! That’s no biker! It’s only blummin’ Kylie!
He’s got a cheek(y girl)
Touch my bum, as they say, this is life.
And here’s a story that isn’t about celebrities, but features a bloke sticking up two middle fingers (which could be directed at Lembit Opik if you imagine really hard):
Melbourne Age: Biker gangs muscle in on local car wash businesses
But if they’re using car washes to launder money, won’t it get all soggy? They didn’t think it through, clearly.