The best of today’s Angry People in Local Newspapers links.

Dorset Echo: Oldiewonks left fummin after scrap metal dumped in alleyway

Who’s a good dog? You are, YOU ARE.

Somerset Live: Dog poo vigilante needs £13,000 so he can go off-road and collect even more turds

You had me at “dog poo vigilante”

Wimbledon Guardian: BINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNS

BINNY BINNY BINS!

Swindon Advertiser: Victim of bike theft keeps seeing his machine being ridden around town…

… but the police are always too slow to do anything about it.

Sucks.

Nottingham Post: Busy road outside school ‘is an accident waiting to happen’

Not only is it an accident waiting to happen, it is also a ticking time bomb, presumably also waiting to happen.

Manchester Evening News: Man converts his narrowboat into a homage to Only Fools and Horses

“Tony, who bought the narrowboat eight years ago, has not yet persuaded his partner Pamela Allen, 62, to move in.”

I wonder why.

And your weird headlines of the day:

Birmingham Live: Cabbage thrown at Aston Villa boss Steve Bruce by angry fan

New York Post: Worst maid ever drank my booze, wrecked my home and passed out on my floor

But you’re still giving her a reference, right?