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Why oh why oh why was I kicked off my hen party flight anger
Don’t piss off flight crew. Really. Do NOT piss off flight crew. They will kick you off your flight, and the whining sound of jet engines will be replaced by the whining sound of you going to the local papers. Nottingham Post: Hen party kicked off flight over ‘Bitches on Tour’ T-shirts OK, no plane has…
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Eleven of the best newspaper ad boards
Not ten, ELEVEN! (Because that’s how clickbait works, clickbait fans) Fine, but what about the other 999,990? 2. “You lying little git, you said it was real” 3. This rhyme doesn’t work if you live south of Watford. 4. HULK RAGE 5. I have tried this at my kids’ school. It is not. 6. #NotActuallySexySlang…
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Please be upstanding for Gay Times
Dodgy headlines? We love a dodgy headline. And as dodgy headlines go, this is one of them. Gay Times: Will Young. Porn. Etc. But really, everybody’s at it. Even the BBC. It’s funny because it’s pooh.
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Death, fear, destruction and lawn bowls – together at last!
NEVER get on the wrong side of lawn green bowlers. They may seem a quiet and docile lot, but once they switch to overarm, they take absolutely no prisoners. And the social nights rival the court of Caligula* Sunderland Echo: Bowlers rage at council over the poor state of their green That chap’s medal was given…
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Is your CCTV trying to see me naked?
Among the many questions not being asked by this gentleman could be “Is your CCTV trying to see me naked?” And the answer is no, the camera is not trying to see him naked. Nor is it trying to spy on kiddiewinks is some bizarre plot by a global pedalo network. BUT IT COULD BE.…
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Mr T works at my local chemist shop and here’s the proof
FACT: TV’s Mr T has found himself a second career working behind the counter at my local chemist shop. I know this for a fact, because he keeps leaving signs with one of his trademark catchphrases all over the place. It won’t be long before we see “I pity the fool”, “I aint getting into…
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The Nazis are back, in tyre-shaped swastika Art Attack form
Kids: Nazis are bad, m’kay? Don’t try any of this stuff at school. Especially the bit about the Nazi tyres. That’s particularly bad. Hitler had Nazi tyres on his staff car, that’s how bad Nazi tyres are. Taranaki Daily News (NZ): Headteacher miffed after vandals smash up school, create giant Nazi Art Attack in the…
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Teenage boozers make golf man sad
Golf. Man’s quest to hit a tiny ball down a hole in the ground from a range of quarter of a mile, while paying extraordinary quantities of money for the privilege. The last thing you want are drunken kiddiewinks making it harder. Renfrew Gazette: Arseholed teenagers making life difficult for local golfers The major problem for…
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Gobsmacked sailor KLAXON
If there’s one thing that brings out the sadface in local newspapers, it’s a charity wronged. In this case, it’s angry sailors getting the wrong message from the local pencil-necked geeks on the council. Kent Live: Old boy ‘gobsmacked’ to be told that he had to pay £50 per day to collect for seafarers’ charity in…
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There’s a MAD man standing in Reading East
This from the Movement for Active Democracy through the door of one of our spotters in the constituency of Reading East. Movement for Active Democracy = MAD, if you haven’t noticed. I think we deserve a closer look at this piece of art, to be honest. I’ve only the one question, and it is the…