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It could be you. But it isn’t
Another week, another bunch of folks dealt a hand from the bottom of the pack. Who, for reasons left unexplained, still went to the papers.
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Oh No! It’s Another Angry People In Local Newspapers Greatest Hits Post
Every now and then (usually when the hosting bill arrives) we remember we’ve got a website and decide to get our money’s worth with a greatest hits post. This is one of those times.
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So you think you’ve seen a panther? It’s never a panther
It’s a cat. That panther you saw, that wolf, that yeti, that ghost, that strange light in the sky. Cat. It’s always a cat.
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A Kim Jong-un gif special
This one’s for all you people out there who wanted gif versions of the Supreme Leader looking at his watch, and walking away from his big missile. You’re welcome. What’s the time? It’s time for the respected General Secretary Top Gun Kim Big Door Kim Don’t say I never do stuff for you guys.
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The best of APILN for December 2021 part II, but stories that are not Christmas is RUINED because they’ve got their own page m’kay?
____________________ Gloucestershire Live: Driver doesn’t over-react in the slightest after receiving a parking ticket On the run from the law, sleeping in barns, foraging for food in hedgerows. Who knows when this renegade will FACE THE LAW. ____________________ Chronicle Live: Mayor is furious over lack of electric car charging points in his town “Phased plasma…
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Furious letters, daft headlines, terrible poetry, and Peter Andre – December 2021
People won’t stop writing terrible poems to local newspapers. Good. ____________________ People won’t stop sending terrible smug letters to local newspapers. Good. ____________________ Local newspapers won’t stop writing pointless stories about Peter Andre. Good. ____________________ They put this behind a paywall. Bad. ____________________ You didn’t see this. Keep scrolling. ___________________ Nobody wants to hear about…
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Christmas is RUINED: The 2021 collection, part three – now into the rolling vistas of UTTER RUINATION and FIRE
____________________ Astonishingly, this isn’t a photo from the Hull Daily Mail about a couple who are furious because their festive tube of Pringles had a dead mouse inside and Christmas is RUINED, it’s a BBC promo image from the Two Doors Down Christmas special. Top tip: If your Christmas is RUINED, follow the professionals and…
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Christmas is RUINED: The 2021 collection, part two – Christmas is RUINEDER
Part One of Christmas is RUINED 2021 is over here. The best non-Christmas is RUINED stories from December are over here. ____________________ Liverpool Echo: Christmas is RUINED after kiddiewink finds chocolates inside her alleged luxury advent calendar aren’t very big at all Top tip: Save your Christmas from being RUINED by a disappointing advent calendar…
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The best of December stories so far but not Christmas is RUINED stories because they’ve got their own post thank you
For the best of this year’s Christmas is RUINED stories, click here. ____________________ Gloucestershire Live: Bomb Squad called to local hospital after man gets a WW2 shell stuck up his bumhole The old “I was cataloging my large collection of wartime memorabilia in the nude, and I slipped and fell onto this large artillery weapon,…
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Christmas is RUINED: The 2021 collection
It doesn’t take much to RUIN Christmas for everybody these days. Try to avoid these unfortunate scenarios to avoid having to run to your local newspaper about the death of this year’s festive season. Wolverhampton Express and Star: Christmas is RUINED after the Coco-Cola truck cancels stop in Wolverhampton Top tip: Avoiding ruining your Christmas…